Look for Schools That Are Partner-Friendly
For Peruvian natives Alejandra Benavides and Nikolas Thiessen, both second-year MBA students at UC Berkeley’s Haas School of Business, the inclusive nature of the school has been very important. “In general, people here are so welcoming of partners,” Alejandra says. The two are in different cohorts and following different career paths, with Alejandra seeking a post-MBA marketing career in e-commerce or retail and Niko pursuing a strategy role, likely at a technology company.
“In our case, it has been amazing to be able to meet more people and share these moments,” she says. “I am always going to dinners—going out in general—with people I would not have met if I wasn’t with Niko,” she says. Her cohort has welcomed Niko warmly, even taking to calling him by her pet name—“chanchi”—which means piglet in Spanish. The inclusiveness extends not only to MBA partners, as in their case, but to non-MBA partners as well, Alejandra says.
Darden has also proven to be an extremely partner-friendly environment. Brittany Frye joined the Darden Partners Association (DPA) almost immediately upon arriving in Charlottesville. “The DPA has been awesome for me,” she says. “It’s the way I have met all of my girlfriends.” The DPA hosts lots of student-friendly events, where Mark is welcome. The school’s social events, meanwhile, are almost always partner-friendly as well, welcoming Brittany.
“The DPA is also really good about organizing events when they know students will be busy, like during exams and recruiting,” Brittany adds. Book clubs, exercise classes and other DPA activities help her fill her time when Mark is busier than usual. And when the women in Mark’s section have ladies’ nights, they make a point of inviting the partners of the men in the section to take part, he says. “It’s a very inclusive community,” he adds.
At McDonough, the Arnolds have found the same thing. Melissa often comes to campus to meet up with the partners of Nick’s classmates, taking advantage of the nursing room at the business school to feed their daughter. The partners’ association at McDonough has also been a source of friends for her, as well as a great resource for recommendations on things like childcare and babysitters. “There’s lots of information, and it’s been a good way to sift through and find out what’s good and what you can ignore,” Nick says.
Carve Out Sacred Couple/Family Time
Every couple we spoke to stressed the importance of setting aside specific time to share as a couple or family and guarding it fiercely. For the Arnolds, Sunday afternoons are family time. Nick makes sure to finish his school work on Friday and Saturday, protecting Sundays for brunches out at family-friendly restaurants or for exploring places like Mt. Vernon or Great Falls in and around DC.
In Evanston, the Seidels invested in a pass for a nearby dog beach and spend an hour every day—at least when it’s not too frigid to be enjoyable—walking their two big dogs together. Last year, when Jill was at home with David and Zac was in his first year as an MBA, she was adamant that they plan vacations around his breaks. “I told him, ‘We have to plan a trip and we are not taking your computer—we are going to make this time just for us.’”
For Alejandra and Niko—both very outdoorsy—the natural beauty surrounding Haas was a big part of what drew them, and they make a point of taking advantage of it as often as they can. Paddle boarding, surfing and spear fishing are some of their favorite activities. They also both love hiking, and just two weeks ago on a hike together in Muir Woods, Niko asked Alejandra to take a picture of him inside a hollowed out redwood tree. “I was zooming in with my phone when I saw him kneeling with an open box,” she says. “I couldn’t believe it—I started screaming.” That night, they celebrated their engagement with Haas classmates at the Winter Ball, many of whom will be invited to the wedding in Peru in spring 2017.
